Tuesday ramblings...

Jordin Sparks gets bit by a pitbull. See, I'm not the only one who can't stand her music...

My buddy Kasey hit me up asking me if I knew what Crabfest was all about here in Ft. Wayne. I said I didn't know but I bet it involves Paris Hilton.

(along those same lines) John Mayer getting rid of his twitter. Now if he could only get rid of those pesky STD's...

Wednesday ramblings...

A new promo for Justin Bieber's appearance on CSI claims Justin "will make you scream!" You know, kind of like when you hear his music...

Paris Hilton is going to do a reality show with Charlie Sheen's ex. It's going to be called "Guess Where I Hit the Drugs"

Jennifer Aniston is now dating some dude named Harry Morton, who is best known for dating Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton. Can't believe this Harry guy is lowering his standards...

American Idol producers say they'll "be in Los Angeles September 22 to look for their next star" They've been looking since 2005....

Headline: "Kelly Osbourne is super skinny" Well, yeah, that's what cocaine will for ya. How do you think Whitney Houston stayed skinny for all those years...

Blink 182 says their new album will be "modern, relevant, fast and fun" I think the words they meant were crappy, lousy, god-awful and "the worst piece of music recorded in the history of man"

Wednesday musings...

New study shows that heavy drinkers outlive non-drinkers. Oh great, Lindsay Lohan will live forever. I know, I know, it was too easy. Feel free to sub in Amy Winehouse when you tell this to your friends, that is if you still remember who Amy Winehouse is.

A man with a gun entered The Discovery Channel headquarters. Man, why couldn't it have been the CW???

MTV and foursquare are teaming up for a promotion letting you get a special badge for checking in at the STD clinic. hahahaha...look, I'm now the mayor of gonorrhea!

Rihanna is the latest "celeb" to be immortalized in wax at Madame Tussauds. Just imagine how much wax they had to use for the forehead...